Monday, 2 July 2007

Always look on the bright side...

While the recent terrorist attacks are a very serious matter anyone who has ever been to Glasgow will undoubtedly see the funny side. Can you imagine it, Shug and Wee Chibby have been drinking Buckfast all day outside the shopping centre and the following conversation ensues.

Hay, Shug, ken whit we should dae to make some coin

Whits that Chibby? Panel some English Bams?

Naw man, we'll dae thit Ram Raiding thay all tak aboot

Ram Raiding? Am no stealing sheep Chibby.

Montay fuck man Shug, you dinnae steal sheep, you ram a motor intae a business and fill it with the gear oot the windae

We'll no get much in ma Punto Chibby

Aye, I ken that like, we could nick that jeep sitting ower there.

Fukinhell Chibby, Aye man lit's dae it. Whae shall we ram? Greggs?

Naw ya fat stoater, I've got a plan, we'll make some proper bevvy tokens oota this one. Let's hit the airport and twoc a fukin Jumbo Jit!!!

I wonder which numpty thought hitting Glasgow would be a good idea - below is a selection of comments made by witnesses on the BBC.

"the sound of it was like...if ye have flung a can of deoderant onto a fire ye will know what im talking about"

"the polis had him doon, i managed to get a boot in once before he was taken away."

"a knew it wiz a terrorist attack right away, cos if ye try that in glasgie ye just get jumped!"

"Me and other folk were just trying to get the boot in and some other guy banjoed him"!

Only in our fair and sceptred isle would you get members of the public running towards a terrorist on fire to "set about him" and fair play to all of the Glaswegians who did, the spanners who hate our way of life might be starting to realise just what they're taking on here in this small island, if not I'll spell it out for them.

We're British, we've been fighting everyone for thousands of years and we like nothing better than a good pagga (Punch up) - you'll never win!

3 comments:

Daz said...

The government need to start getting tough with these nutters. Starting off by doing away with all this human rights bollocks and kicking out anyone with extremist musilim views. They know who they are because they're all claiming fucking benefits.

Sean said...

We've got shite immigration, toughen up on that and it's a start. It's pretty harsh trying to get in any other country in the EU - soft touch UK - we'll give you money for nothing then you can bombs us

Rivs said...

You're not wrong boys - There's a backlash coming soon I think and Blair got himself out of the way just in time to leave his 'mate' Gordon to deal with it.

Vive la revolution!