Thursday, 26 June 2008

Separated at Birth?? Part 2

Following on from my successful comparison of Tony Blair and Graeme Souness (aye it was a while back I know) I'd like to present you with more compelling evidence that two well known dipshits are in fact one and the same person.

Ladies and Gentlemen I give you Gordon Brown and Robert Mugabe!

Ridiculous? Let’s look at the facts shall we….

• Both have ruined the economy of their various countries
• Both have seen prices spiral out of control to the point where ordinary people are struggling badly
• Both are out of touch with the wishes of their citizens
• Both preside over governments that are rumoured to be rife with corruption.
• Both employ ministers that make sure they’re alright while everyone else suffers in a country racked by crime and violence
• Neither of them have been elected to their position

I rest my case…

ps - While you're following government advice not to have a payrise over two percent even though prices are going through the roof for everything and people will almost certainly freeze/starve to death this winter, they're happily awarding themselves another forty grand a year. Nice work if you can get it eh?

They're all scum.

Friday, 20 June 2008

No, no, no, no, no, no ,no Yes…

I never tire of slagging off politicians – which is lucky because they’re always doing things I don’t like!

For instance, this week the Irish people voted against the EU treaty (you know the one that our unelected prime minister was meant to give us a referendum on as it was in his party’s manifesto during the last election) and that should have been that.

The rules of that particular piece of european nonsense state that if the treaty is not ratified by every member state then it is unworkable and, to all intents and purposes, dead.

So did our euro masters take their snouts from the trough long enough to follow their own rules and leave us with a little bit of self governance?

Did they fuck – the Irish premier has been told to go away and turn the no into a yes so they can all continue on the gravy train and we can have a european army as well as a european president running our country. Expect the Irish to be having another referendum sometime soon after they’ve been offered a load of incentives to say yes.

Have any of the euro states spoken up in favour of the Irish? Well the Czech’s did (and fair play to them) but our own PM – the unelected, out of touch and deeply unlikeable Gordon Brown, had his tongue up the arse of the French and Germans quicker than you can say ‘I think I’ll put taxes up on petrol’.

Politicians - they’re all scum.

Have a good weekend.

Ps – Tom Harris – Transport Minister and Labour MP for Glasgow South …thinks we’re all whining and we’ve never had it so good – I’m guessing he gets his petrol on ‘expenses’. Make sure you bear it in mind come election time.

PPs – The small ‘e’ in european was deliberate – I’m good at spelling me – I don’t officially recognise them as having owt to do with me so fuck them.

PPPs – you can’t beat a small ‘e’...!!

Friday, 13 June 2008

Miscellaneous nonsense

Not much going on at the minute really. If you’re interested in motorsport (which I’m not ironically) then the firm I work for are competing in the World Rally Championship in Turkey this weekend as well as running a racing team at Le Mans 24 hour race tomorrow.

Just thought I’d mention it really…don’t really give a fuck meself.

Book wise – I can sum up what’s happening in three words…..Absolutely fucking nowt!

I’m undecided whether to start plotting a new fiction book or scribble some bits for a new non fiction book I’m thinking of writing with a view to selling parts of it as articles to the various lads mags.

I was gonna call it ‘The Fasthands Theory – Blood, sweat and beers’ and it’ll be about me learning to box – what do you reckon?

That apart I’m going out tomorrow on a twelve hour pass so that’ll be messy – I understand my ‘friends in the north’ are doing the same so I’ll be there in spirit – texting abuse all day!

Anyway, that’s it, have a good one and as ever, if owt happens you’ll know first.


Ps – even though I don’t care about motorsport I am narked that the driveshaft’s fucked on my car – cheers God!

Wednesday, 4 June 2008

Busy, Busy, Busy

I know, I know, It’s been a while and I’m sorry. Loads of stuff has been going on and frankly I’m knackered.

Anyway there’s been far too much news for me to comment on, suffice to say that politicians resisting all attempts to have some form of transparency where their expenses are concerned would suggest someone was up to something somewhere.

Obviously that’s just my opinion and there’s no evidence that anyone is breaking the law but a system whereby no-one has to produce any receipts and everything is funded by the taxpayer leads me to only one conclusion :- they’re all a bunch of self serving, grasping cunts and we’d be better off without them.

Right then, writing stuff.

Well as I said about a week ago ‘I’m Rivelino’ is finished and is with my readers. Random House haven’t, as yet, beaten down my door waving a big fat cheque but I’m ever hopeful. I have however spoken to a regional publisher who is very interested in the life story of fat geordie with a devastating line in chat though – he just needs to run it by his business partner so fingers crossed.

I’ll let you know first – watch this space.

Further to that I was recently approached by a brand new independent publisher with a view to publishing one of my short pieces on their brand new website. The publisher is ‘Byker Books’ and the page on their site is called ‘Radgepacket’ it’s designed to promote up and coming authors and as far as I’m concerned all publicity is good so I agreed to let them use ‘Blagger’.

Here’s the link – see what you think of them and let me know.

Byker Books

Anyway, that’s it for now but I’ll leave with you with a little question. I’ve got a cold and apparently that means I’ve got ‘Man Flu’ so does that mean when lasses get a sniffle they’ve got Bird Flu?

And does that mean we can cull them?